Unlike the stressful shopping gauntlet of Christmas or the psychotic distant relative visitor anxiety of Thanksgiving, the countdown to Halloween is as great as the actual holiday.
As the week before All Hallows Eve sprints by, treat yourself to some scary cinema to further prepare yourself for a night of monstrous fun.
Of course, there are thousands of titles to choose from in the horror genre. Most are awful, some are just bad and a select few are masterpieces. I’ve watched them all so you don’t have to, and here are some of my favorites.
The most essential timely horror film is of course John Carpenter’s “Halloween.” Aside from its obvious link to the holiday, “Halloween” is a great pick because it remains one of the most genuinely scary films ever made. While “Halloween” has been unfairly lumped into the “slasher” sub-genre, the absence of gore is actually one of the movie’s strongest tools. There are no gimmicks here, just a classy and truly terrifying film.
Tobe Hooper’s “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” is akin to “Halloween” in many aspects. Both films produce undeniably scary moods with small budgets, both have been imitated repeatedly by legions of hacks (I’m looking at you, Rob Zombie) and both remain horrifying decades after their release. The introduction of Leatherface is still one of the most jolting scenes in screen history, and “Chainsaw” provides a thorough glimpse into horror that no film since has come close to matching.
Italian horror is definitely an acquired taste, but if you’re interested in something radically different than anything you have ever seen, explore the work of Dario Argento. Known for his array of wildly inventive camera-work and unquestionably revolting gore sequences, Argento remains an underground favorite. His scariest is “Suspiria,” a gloomy and atmospheric story of a coven of witches masquerading as a dance academy.
If you enjoy the largely bland post “Scream” cookie cutter horror films that have defecated in our multiplexes for the past decade, then “Suspiria” is not for you. But if you think you can handle a pummeling succession of intense scenes that will remain with you for the rest of your life, give this one a look.
Horror movies can be simultaneously scary and funny, so if your Halloween spirit requires some more light-hearted fare, there are a wealth of great titles at your disposal.
Well worth tracking down is Kevin S. Tenney’s “Night of the Demons.” This one revolves around a requisite group of obnoxious teenagers who spend Halloween night in a old abandoned house, where they are possessed one by one by a demonic spirit they inadvertently set free. Make no mistake, this is a bad movie all around, but it never takes itself seriously enough to be anything but a blast. “Night” has enough delightfully disgusting gore effects, well-executed scare sequences, and gratuitous T & A to keep any horror fan riveted. The scene where B-movie scream queen Linnea Quigley pushes a lipstick container into her nipple must be seen to be believed. “Night of the Demons” is unfortunately only available on import DVD, so you’ll have to dust off your VCR to catch this one, but you’ll have great fun if you do.
Another classic of high camp value is Stuart Gordon’s “Re-animator.” All you really need to know about this film is in the tagline: “Herbert West has a good head on his shoulders.. and another one in a tray on his desk.” Another example of a fine piece of cinema that never takes itself too seriously, “Re-animator” is a riot.
There’s plenty of gruesome goodness to be had with “Re-animator,” but it is the black comedy that really pushes this one into the classic category.
Lastly, another film that will always remain dear to my heart is George Romero’s “Creepshow.” You stoners can indulge your short attention spans with the vignette format of the five stories that comprise the film, while the highly stylized lighting and comic-book framing will capture the imagination of you art film junkies. Actually, I guess that’s kind of the same group, isn’t it?
“Creepshow” is a loving homage to the EC horror comics of the ’50s, and it captures the mirthful spirit of those classic tales perfectly. In addition to boasting a diverse cast and the superlative special effects of Tom Savini, “Creepshow” also features the stories of Stephen King. But don’t let that scare you away. For once, Stephen King’s stories are adapted into a great film here, and this one lives up to its tagline: “The most fun you’ll ever have being scared.” One warning, however: If you hate cockroaches, keep a stomach distress bag handy.
As I said, there are scores of other options for those looking for horror, but I don’t think the editors of the Campus Times really want me to ramble on for their entire 12 pages.
Twelve pages of nothing but me? Now, that’s scary.
Taylor Kingsbury, a senior journalism major, is a columnist for the Campus Times. He can be reached by e-mail at happyendingrocks@hotmail.com.
